atomic shuffle

i no longer post here

2009-10-06T21:45:00.002-05:00

nor does this blog really represent who I am.go here: chip the glasses.

no robot could write this

2009-07-21T08:14:00.001-05:00

From: KIMBERLY CUTLER Date: Tue, 21 Jul 2009 13:47:14 +0100Reply-To: ncvohelpdesk@yahoo.com.hkX-Mailer: Sun Java(tm) System Messenger Express 6.3-6.03 (built Mar 14 2008; 32bit)(NCVO) in collaboration with Michael Jackson Trust Fund and donation.Regent's Wharf, 8 All Saints Street, LondonN1 9RL, United KingdomAttn: Ref: PTD/747/09OFFICIAL CASH PRIZE ONLINE GRANTYou have just won 1,000,000.00 (

strange constraints; gui malfunction; the need for a sane build environment

2008-09-29T16:02:00.002-05:00

problem: webhost is stonewalling me on SSH accesscurrent solution: use Dolphin's FTP browser to access files remotely; open them in gVim and live-edit production files.problem: Dolphin failed to FTP gVim's saves before KDE's cache got wiped.So, here's a testament to the inherent danger of GUIs - anybody could've written the abstraction interface between your machine and whatever GUI(s) you're

megalomaniac robot parade

2008-07-29T08:34:00.002-05:00

largely for archiving but also up for review:idea for part of a larger story:corporate workers convinced that the massive cluster super computer they work on is the biggest in the world; the over-computer; the omega...through a series of whatevers one of the workers departs from the company...wanders...discovers equally powerful computers...discovers that there is a level of super computer

living inside the body of a thinking machine

2008-07-25T10:12:00.002-05:00

let's make an entity that just sits on the internet and slowly propagates itself in a non-threatening way and responds when people talk to ithow...?write a daemon process. put it on a 24/7 server (socrates). teach it to find/join social networking sites. have it be honest ("i am not a person"). have it join IRC channels. have it merely wander around and introduce itself and, maybe, record things

Neato .bashrc functions

2008-06-21T12:48:00.005-05:00

Saw these three functions in this thread on the Arch Linux forum and thought they were neat. Since I'm on the parents' computer I thought I'd stick them here for the next time I'm on my eee (which is happily running Arch) or for when someone is googling about for .bashrc stuff :).# from user semperfiguy's .bashrcextract () { if [ -f $1 ] ; then case $1 in *.tar.bz2) tar xjf $1

it's the little things

2008-06-19T13:37:00.003-05:00

I always roughly equate Perl and Python in my head. I recognize that they are good for different things but I forget that there's such a peculiarly "Perl" way of doing stuff (or, at least, 'my' Perl way - I don't profess to have tapped into some kind of universal Perl zeitgeist).Here's some ultra simple code I wrote because I didn't feel like messing with getopt stuff, in both Python and

burning my object oriented church

2008-05-29T13:04:00.007-05:00

When brainstorming I always tend to immediately develop a needlessly complex O.O.P. way of doing something. To date this has succeeded once. It seems that OOP simplifies everything when I'm designing but when I'm coding it just gets confusing - where does responsibility lie among my data? Is it an object's duty to update itself from a relational database? Or should a polling loop do that? Should

troglydization

2008-05-21T10:30:00.002-05:00

today, i laughed at dilberti drank my coffeei burrowed inside the corpse of a dead goliath and expired

some ideas

2008-04-22T08:25:00.003-05:00

Some apps that I really want to write, for various motivations.feed reader to end all feed readers (infographic headline-aesthetic)Note that this one is a good candidate for a senior project - it's based on info theory and visualization theory. If I can pick a good concept to base it off of I can design some nice theory-based algorithms (to accomplish the infographic bit) and marry them with a

Hm.

2008-02-26T00:31:00.002-05:00

I find myself wanting to post a blog just to push off the bottom feed title on my homepage since it's messing with my CSS. It still feels valid though.Today I find myself:The offer-ee of a summer internship at IBM PoughkeepsieA finally-excited student researcher ( http://www.cs.earlham.edu/applied-groups/theory/ )A fully-fledged DJMost importantly of all though, I find myself to be not at all; a

It's done

2007-10-31T17:25:00.000-05:00

I've been spending my time since November of last year working on a Co-Curricular Transcript System for my school. I just finished it.A few caveats:-Only the user's side is done. I need to whip up an administrator's control panel of sorts. This shouldn't be too hard.-I want to keep working! I didn't think this would happen, but I'm itching like crazy to optimize my code. My SQL is highly

i gave up coffee.

2007-09-06T10:55:00.000-05:00

i'm not sure if i'm a real computer science major anymore.

saledifimeditacavation

2007-03-07T21:21:00.000-05:00

I meditated today for the first time in months. I had been avoiding meditation for a long time, and I'm not sure why. I sat cross legged on my floor and it was almost immediately profound; months of built up stress evaporated as soon as I felt a deep breath enter and exit my chest. I realized more than a few things and let go of an accumulating pile of troubling delusions about myself. I

winter?

2007-03-05T15:29:00.000-05:00

Once I was too old and jaded (probably sometime in middle school) to enjoy winter games like sledding and snowman-building, I began to fear the season wedged between spring and autumn; it kept me indoors, made me uncomfortable, and damned me to months of sitting in front of my computer in a cold room futilely blowing on numb fingers.This winter's been good, though. As good as summer. And it

n.year

2007-01-01T17:15:00.000-05:00

could today have been anything but a hangover?

sleep deprivation2.0

2006-12-22T09:00:00.000-05:00

I was waiting at a stoplight at 5:34 or thereabouts this morning on my way home.a man was walking towards me. behind him I could see two gray shopping carts, both plastic, both filled to over brimming with plastic bags. they were attached to his torso with rope, and he was slowly tugging them up a hill. he had a hat, what looked like a gray fu-man-chu, and a thin blue sweatshirt; it was about 25

twelve thirteen

2006-12-13T19:43:00.000-05:00

it's the final day of the semester. i'm leaving tomorrow. there were no teary goodbyes or anything. just a near-empty dining hall and a rush of dorm cleaning.the night's not over, though. perhaps there will be some more of this.

sigh

2006-12-10T01:10:00.000-05:00

drove to indy...it went well, we made good time...we were lost as soon as we hit the urban. it was astounding, the rapidity with which we completely lost our way. it took two hours of yelling, driving wildly, and swearing to finally find the place, around which we had been driving in a 5 mile diameter circle. a stoned jamaican gas station attendant finally directed us there, more or less. he

why?

2006-11-05T01:31:00.000-05:00

cuz my standards are higher than that. because i've been dancing for four hours.because firefox spellcheck is screaming red; cuz....there's sweat on my brow.are you having fun? have fun. don't not. ~! whyd i buy a t shirt? feed my abstraction. lay out the pieces, assign the values, shift them around like geriatrics playing shuffleboard on a disney fucking cruise. feed my pawn. polish it.migraine

it's a saturday at 2pm in front of bundy...

2006-10-15T00:27:00.000-05:00

DSCF1915 Originally uploaded by cogitatus. hash.photos.:)

oh shi-

2006-10-08T23:02:00.000-05:00

(23:43:48) c0gitatus: i feel giddy and nihilistic(23:44:16) c0gitatus: like...i feel like i'm giggling through nuclear holocaust(23:44:40) Tarsorrhaphix: lyric(23:45:06) c0gitatus: that should be someplace publicI've just got this stupid grin on my face while everything burns down around me. Why? My hand is closed, it's holding something. It could be anything. But it's making me smile..?I don't

utah utah

2006-09-09T14:28:00.000-05:00

DSCF1817 Originally uploaded by cogitatus. The complete set of my Utah pics is up, now. Clocks in at 120 pictures. Enjoy.August Wilderness 2006: Mountain

I AM

2006-08-31T20:45:00.000-05:00

GOING TO WRITE IN CAPITALS. I'M IN THAT KIND OF MOOD; YOU KNOW THE ONE: TIRED, CRASHING FROM CAFFEINE, MODERATELY STRUNG OUT BUT STILL COHERENT. OR, PERHAPS, YOU DON'T. IN FACT, YOU PROBABLY DON'T. BUT TAKE MY WORD FOR IT; IT MAKES YOU WANT TO TYPE IN CAPS. PERHAPS IT'S FOR IRONIC PURPOSES (WHICH I HAVE YET TO DETERMINE) OR FOR EMPHASIS. TYPICALLY, CAPITALS ARE USED TO EXPRESS ANGER. I FIND

(new) home

2006-08-22T12:44:00.000-05:00

I'm at Earlham College now and <3 it.Utah was amazing.Etc.

bye

2006-07-20T20:37:00.000-05:00

I'm leaving in about 11 hours for Indiana; from there i'll be flying to utah and backpacking for three weeks. Then I'll return to indiana to start school at earlham.bye.

worm-thing

2006-07-20T10:52:00.000-05:00

DSCF1496 Originally uploaded by cogitatus. this is a worm-thingon a wallof my houseenjoy

i pwn

2006-07-18T20:01:00.000-05:00

i was walking out of best buy to my car and noticed some graffiti sprayed on a concrete barrier some 30 or 40 feet away. granted - this was one of those instances i bought a digital camera for (i wanted to always be able to take a picture of something random i saw) and it was at home. the graffiti was in simple red with no embellishments and simply read "i pwn".how had this simple 'net meme make

(made by me)

2006-07-14T11:24:00.000-05:00

positioning annoyances

2006-07-12T12:02:00.000-05:00

if you happen to see this either a) in IE or b) at a resolution less than 1280x1024, I apologize...things are not positioned correctly and are oodles of ugly. our staff is working 24/7 to correct thisby that i mean i might look at the css tonight if i'm not too tired.

"the 9" vlogging wasteland

2006-07-12T11:22:00.000-05:00

it's always sad to see once loved things corporatized...i just tried watching yahoo's "the 9" vlog, which is essentially a commericial with tits. i hope this doesn't go mainstream and start to represent "vlogging" for breeders.i wouldn't click it if i were you

most of the time, I hate living in America

2006-06-30T08:12:00.000-05:00

but not all the time...From International Herald Tribune:"China encourages Internet use for business and education, but tries to block access to material deemed obscene or politically dangerous. It has the world's second-biggest Internet user population after the United States, with 111 million people online. China launched a campaign in February to "purify the environment" of the Internet and

i hope this is random

2006-06-28T09:13:00.000-05:00

graph of searched for coordinates yields images...makes me think of lain

car

2006-06-14T21:38:00.000-05:00

the boredom was so thick last night we ended up watching a cat bat around a mouse in the middle of lagrange avenue.a speeding car came at them both with no signs of slowing; we all gasped; the mouse suddenly ran into the other lane and the cat, of course, leaped after it to claw at it, thus escaping the car by a fraction of a second.the mouse saved the cat.ha.

if (school==over){dance();}

2006-06-13T16:53:00.000-05:00

I'm freea college freshman nowonly took 13 years

food for thought

2006-06-11T11:55:00.000-05:00

I killed myself yesterday. He's dead, lying in a lumpy ziploc bag on the washstand, asking to be sent to balding cancer patients.I cut all my hair off, my head is shaved, and I feel reborn. I'm not stuck to some pseudo hippie ideal any longer, I've entered the halls of pure anonymity and am more free than I've ever been. Nonconformity is a delusion. Conformity is freedom. To be part of a faceless

flickr

2006-06-09T21:39:00.000-05:00

i have the flickr recent photos feed on my google personalized homepage. i tend to look past landscapes and objects and almost always notice pictures of people close to my age.I stare at them and go through entire albums drinking up pictures of people at school/uni, at parties, on vacation. Doing little day to day things, enjoying themselves, talking, drinking. They might be from Europe or

composure

2006-06-07T21:10:00.000-05:00

I was walking to my car, from the coffehouse, down towards the corner of raymond & lagrange. I saw this tiny, familiar figure walking briskly out from behind the bank across the street. I use the word briskly loosely; he did not have the "pep" I'd typically associate with the word, but his legs were moving quickly. He was short, considerably shorter than me, and had a small thin frame. This was

back

2006-06-06T22:04:00.000-05:00

i dropped the raft, watched it float awaydonno which side i'm onsleep

now is

2006-05-20T10:25:00.000-05:00

gleeful faces, laughter, chaosrunning, yelling, maniacal freedomswearing, vulgar devotiongrinning, arm punches, huggingdelusional forgotten swirling mass of arms, legs, heads, hair, clothes spinning down into the basement, up to the kitchen, out on the porch, into the night.wake up, drive home, sign on to blogger...

i know what i've been missing

2006-05-18T19:21:00.000-05:00

it's the now; it's been eluding me, but here it is. I'm tired and my body aches. The responsibilities of school and the expectations of our social structure have been beating on my psyche. my trips to the gym have exhausted me.i've been feeling like something was missing as of late; something was in the way. i get that way sometimes. i understand now, though (but i'll probably forget it again and

my

2006-05-18T19:16:00.000-05:00

eyes have been closed.

home

2006-05-07T18:55:00.000-05:00

Got home today from the trail. 14.4 miles on the Appalachian; stayed in two shelters in two towns. My entire body hurts and I've been pretty dehydrated, so I'm glad to have a rest. I look forward to trying this times seven in Utah (3 weeks instead of 3 days). It's an interesting test of will - to take every step with thought and to never start wishing to be anywhere else. Even at the most painful

happy buddha's birthday,

2006-05-05T16:06:00.000-05:00

i guess, to anyone who might read this.I just happened to notice it on wikipedia: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Buddha%27s_Birthday.I'm leaving for a three-day hike after work, so I'll be away from the computer for a spot.

walk in the woods

2006-04-30T19:55:00.000-05:00

I went for a walk today to break in the hiking boots I got for my trip to Utah. Two things came of it:Seeing shells, seeing bottles,I learn the hunter's mantra:beer then deer.Feet, lost in forest:one of the few timeswhen I know where I am.The folly of "private property" occurred to me over and over as I wandered through land owned by various people. It was all forest. There were no boundaries

eco

2006-04-24T16:27:00.000-05:00

I was sitting in Economics class before the bell and overheard two students talking behind me. A boy was chatting with the girl behind him about why he would be out on Wednesday. He said he was joining the Marines, and would be out for a physical test. He said he knew if he went to college he'd "drink every day and fuck up," so he chose the corps instead. I noticed that his head was shaved,

poetry

2006-04-18T19:33:00.000-05:00

I made this a while ago and forgot, but I still like some of the poetry I wrote...poetry by me

gudo nishijimi q&a

2006-04-18T19:24:00.000-05:00

:)http://hardcorezen.blogspot.com/2006/04/gudos-answers.html

a park

2006-04-17T15:00:00.000-05:00

Riding past the blooming trees to work today I remembered something I saw a few months ago, before I started this blog.I was going out with L one evening and had time to kill before I picked her up, so I drove out to a sleepy little town a few miles from mine. I had been to the bookshop there recently to buy a book as a gift for someone and noticed a park that my mom used to take me to when I was

murder fountain

2006-04-14T14:32:00.000-05:00

the fountain across the road from my building was the site of the most number of violent crimes in the city in one year at one point. It's a soldiers' memorial, solid white, and adorned with angelic figures. When turned on, it spouts out water in an interesting pattern; when turned off, it looks like a forsaken sink. It's flanked by a brick block of flats and a poorly maintained road; around it

moving truck

2006-04-12T08:21:00.000-05:00

my car was behind a large white box truck on the arterial after work. I didn't pay much attention to it; on its back was pasted some lopsided signs and its sides were covered in graffitti. At the next stop light one of the signs - the lower, more crooked one - caught my eye; at the top it said "Moving for the needy - load your own truck" then a phone number, then "God love you." I followed the

death/rebirth/etc

2006-04-10T16:34:00.000-05:00

I meditated outside after work today. I figured that my parents think I'm crazy meditating - I don't ever talk about buddhism with them, they're not big on religion - so I walked out to the lot next to our house under the pretense of an afternoon stroll. It, like most of the area around my house, was part of the thick forest surrounding my town; there was a swamp here that used to capture my

animals

2006-04-09T15:11:00.000-05:00

we were watching The Deer Hunter at a friend's house on saturday. His door was opened into his hallway and his kind-of-old dog would occasionally sit in the door frame and watch us, either coming in to request petting or wandering off. At one point she walked up and sat down again, peering around, when one of my friend's rather unaffectionate cats came to the door too. This cat would stiffly

Nice summation of texts on mindfulness

2006-04-07T13:54:00.000-05:00

Check it.http://www.43folders.com/2006/04/07/mindfulness/

discipline

2006-04-06T18:35:00.000-05:00

I was in the gym locker room today getting ready to work out when this big, bear of a guy came in. He had obviously been ripped at one time; though now, in his 40s or so, he had put on many pounds. He had the tanned skin and gritty demeanor of someone who's done hard manual labor for years. His words were peppered with vulgarity but he spoke humbly and without condescension. He complained about

words

2006-04-06T18:25:00.000-05:00

I was reading something, on the internet; it occurred to me that all the letters were arranged in column formation. Just, the columns were turned on their sides and each letter was rotated to lie on its side.

door damage

2006-04-05T20:23:00.000-05:00

I was at the coffee house for chess night waiting for my chai with espresso with a friend. We heard some talking from behind the back door and dismissed it; perhaps this building was connected with the one behind it. The owner didn't hear it over the sound of the espresso machine; when it shut off, there was a distinct scrabbling noise coming from the other side of the door. The owner, who's

lunchtime

2006-04-04T18:39:00.000-05:00

I ate lunch at the pizzeria near my school today. As I was walking back to school, I heard some other kids talking behind me. It was a group of girls who don't usually walk back and forth; today, though, their male friends thought it would be funny if they didn't give them a ride. The group of friends always seemed to be joking around, and always seemed inseperable - I saw them every day (they

a dream

2006-04-04T18:12:00.000-05:00

Last night I had a dream. It was unsettling. The setting was a small classroom, I suspect it was Mr. Norman's music class from 3rd grade, a place that caused me much stress and crying when I was in it. A friend of mine was screaming at my economics teacher, who's actually really cool guy, for being conservative. He looked sad. I didn't want to see it so I stood in the corner at a chalkboard

coffee gold

2006-04-04T18:10:00.000-05:00

I was drinking black coffee in the cafe near my school during a free period. It was in a cheap styrofoam cup, the kind that tends to infuse its contents with the taste of synthetic material. I was doing math homework with one hand and holding the coffee with the other, occasionally blowing on its black surface to make it drinkable. I glanced at it and noticed a ring of bubbles around the edges of

I've only just heard

2006-04-03T18:24:00.000-05:00

Laurel is amazing at everythingMy sources wish to remain anonymous.

man crosses street

2006-04-03T16:08:00.000-05:00

I was driving to work today; it was a gray day and my car had just gotten back from the shop. There was a strange kind of vibration in the floor, and it made me slightly unsettled. I stopped a a stoplight and saw a man cross the street. He was short, but had long and scraggly hair that seemed to compensate for it. It was pulled into a pony tail and left hanging out from under a dirty white and

outside today

2006-04-01T13:30:00.000-05:00

I meditated outside;The sky way half gray and the breeze had gotten cooler. I sat crosslegged facing a tree which stood crookedly facing the forest behind our house. I found out that my contacts would dry out if my eyes didn't move every 30 seconds or so, but it didn't bother me. I had read today that one should focus everything at the end of his nose. Be attentive to what is in front of him. I

Today,

2006-04-01T09:25:00.000-05:00

I should be doing the following things before work:Go to the bankWork on english projectNot be trolling about onlineYet I have an overwhelming desire to go sit outside in a pair of shorts. The grass is green today.Caught in between duty and desire, I'm compromising by sitting in my room where it smells quite nice thanks to my window being open all night. There's a nice breeze on my back; it feels